Appreciation

This week was an ECP week, so I spent the afternoon yesterday and today in the four chair ECP room getting treatment. Sitting across from me yesterday was a man who was so terribly emaciated and weak that he couldn't even get into and out of his chair by himself, someone had to lift him. Today a young woman sat across from me, a lung transplant recipient whose body had recently begun to reject her lungs. She's also on the list for a kidney transplant and may eventually have to get another lung transplant if they can't control the rejection reaction. She goes back and forth between three different hospitals in two states, is on a long list of medications, and did I mention she also has steroid-induced diabetes?

This afternoon I was angry. I wasn't angry at the other patients, I was angry at the majority of people in the world. You know, the ones who complain about everything - work, sleep patterns, internet problems, etc. The people who in all seriousness think their lives suck. We all know them, we all put up with their whining, we all nod along sympathetically as they continue to list the minor problems that make their life one big FML every single day. I looked at these poor people in front of me and was angry at the people in the world who live great lives and still think they have problems. Seriously? Seriously? Let's see, life threatening illness and the daily issues caused by it versus having homework or annoying coworkers or noisy neighbors. I wonder which one I would choose? People like that should get down on their knees five times a day and thank whatever power they believe in that they have their health, that their lives aren't like these people I met in ECP. Or like mine, for that matter. It makes me furious. It makes me furious that there are so many people who can't put things in perspective, shut their mouths, and be grateful for what they have. Do they really think their life is that hard? They should try spending one day like the lung transplant patient and then see how terrible their life looks. Why do we find it so hard to just appreciate what we have?

Then I calmed down, and I felt sorry for those people, those people who can't put their lives into perspective. I feel sorry for them because they will always be unhappy, because they can't see how good they have it. They look around them and all they see is the next thing that can go wrong, the next thing to complain about. They have no appreciation for life and so cannot fully live their lives the way someone who knows how precious every day is can live their life. They don't know how to take advantage of every good moment and appreciate how good life can be.

My friend T, Theresa, is dying of leukemia, as I shared with you a few weeks ago. This past weekend she posted a really beautiful guest blog post here. Theresa is the kind of friend everyone should have. Not only is she amazingly thoughtful, caring, beautiful and kind, but speaking with her makes me want to be a better person, and her words inspire me to be better. The world will be a little less bright when she is no longer in it. I hope that you will find the same inspiration in her words and life as I do.