Sunday, April 19, 2009

Why Yogurt Stealing Prof is a Liar and Made Me Miss My Bus

As you are all azare, we've been having some problems with people stealing food on the professors' hallway at the lycee where I live. I did go to speak to the agent comptable about this problem about a week ago, and he said basically tant pis and that it was our problem to regulate. He is a jerk (more about that particular issue later). I knew I had to confront the yogurt stealer, but this is clearly a very delicate issue. I don't have any hard proof that it's him, only very strong circumstantial evidence (the fact that he always replaces whatever he's stolen with yogurt from the cafeteria, where he eats all the time), so I decided (with some advice from Mom) that I should just mention that some is stealing yogurt and ask if it had happened to him to and express my dismay at the situation.

So on Thursday this past week he was at the bus stop when I got there, and I knew I had to say something. I started off saying that we were having problems with stolen food on the hallway and asked if anyone had stolen his food. So he kind of smiles, looks down at the ground, and then looks back up and says "yeah, someone has taken my food too."

WHAT!!!!!!!! YOU LIAR!!!!!!!!

I was shellshocked. What kind of moron just lies about the food being taken? What a jerk! What kind of an idiot does he think I am? But I was so surprised that I couldn't think of anything to say except for "yeah, it's so rude, I don't know who would do that." He tries to justify his innocence by saying that he eats in the cafeteria anyway. Then I eventually composed myself enough to use my best displeased teacher voice and go on and on about how rude and mean and inconsiderate it is to steal food. Of course I didn't have enough presence of mind to tell him that whoever it is is replacing the food they steal with yogurts from the cafeteria, not as though it would have made a difference anyway because he clearly thinks that he's really pulled the wool over my eyes!

And I was still steaming when the bus came up and I got on right after him. I got off at the train station to switch to the other bus line, and as I was crossing the street I stopped cold.

I had gotten on the wrong bus!

I was mildly hysterical, because at this point I had missed the bus I needed to be on to get to my Thursday school (instead I had gotten on Friday school bus). I made a panicked, incomprehensible call to Thursday School (C School, where I teach the CLIS class and my genius CE1s) to tell them I had missed the bus. Then I decided to call a coworker who sometimes gives me a ride when we're at the same school (and invites me over to eat frogs' legs). She was nice enough to come pick me up and drive me to C School on her way to V School, so I ended up getting there anyway. But geez! Quite a morning.

I had been so discombobulated and confused all week anyway because I hadn't taught Thursday and Friday the week before (I was sick), then Monday was a holiday, and I was just completely disoriented. I had been worried all year that I was going to take the wrong bus one day, and now I finally did it. Hopefully that means I won't do it again.

But clearly the moral of the story is that it is Lying Awkward Yogurt Stealer's fault. What a jerk. We are now enemies. There is bad blood between us. I mean really, LYING about getting his food stolen? His food was stolen because he ate it! He could have just said he hadn't had anything stolen and didn't know anything about it but no. He LIED. I do not like liars.

And to top off a frustrating week at the lycee, remember the work they are doing on the hallway to make it all spiffy and new and give us a new bathroom and kitchen? On Tuesday they took out the shower. And just left it like that. We haven't had a shower on the hall since Tuesday. I've had to go down two floors to the cafeteria and shower in the locker room for the cafeteria workers. This is not fun early in the morning and makes me have to wake up earlier. Supposedly they are working for a few days this coming week on the hallway, and we had better have a shower by the time I come back, or else I will be complaining. See how the agent comptable is a jerk?

But now I'm on VACATION for two weeks! I will try to relax, and man do I need to. Wait until you hear the crazy story from Friday before I left.....


Andromeda said...

Oh man!! I feel kind of bad for him though, I totally understand awkward. Is it too late in the year to buy your own little fridge and keep food there?

Be careful not to let him know you are enemies or he may retaliate with even more stealing!!

Vacation for me too! yay!! Enjoy it!

Monique said...

Hey wait.... here's how you catch him in his lie. How does someone steal your food if you eat in the cafeteria? Does he even HAVE any food to be stolen!?

I hope this comes to some resolution soon.... for the sake of your blood pressure haha :) Just kidding, that's really shady though.

Kim said...

Argh how annoying! Stupid stealing yoghurt man. What a pity he isn't stealing something you could taint. I remember when we were kids we used to hang our bags out in a corridor whilst we were in the classroom. The toilet was through this corridor and from time to time lunches were being stolen from particular kids. The thief/ves must've discovered favourites. A sneeky father then put chilli in his kids sandwich, the lunch was never stolen again. Another parent put in a catfood sandwich. There was talk of tainting the packaging with ragwart dye (a spray for a weed which is bright purple and STAINS) so to find the culprit!

Ohhhhh I'm waiting for the Friday story!!!!